How to Make Small Talk at a Wedding

We've all been there, haven't we? 

You're at a wedding and there's either no plus-one, or you don't have anyone to take.

So, you turn up and smile.

Perhaps you already know a few people and can have a conversation and a joke with them. 

It isn't so bad, is it? 

There you all are, laughing away as you read the place settings only to find out that they're all together and you? You're...

Aw, hell. 

You don't know a single person on this table. 

Oh, but THANK THE STARS because there's wine!

Alcohol can be an amazing conversation facilitator, but I'm not proposing that we all develop a drinking problem.

 I'm just saying that it can help but that doesn't mean that it's the answer.  At some weddings alcohol is the only answer.  

So, in the pursuit of finding a better way to communicate during awkward social functions we're presenting 8 tips to see you through the reception. 

1. Above absolutely all else, make sure that you introduce yourself. If you're sitting down last, then make eye contact with at least two people and sweep the table with a glance as you take your seat. Say hello to everyone and tell them your name. If you're not introduced, and just take your seat quietly, it will be so much harder to break into a conversation. People will find it easier to ignore you because they don't know you.
   
   
2. Discuss any shared experiences you've all had during the day. Even if it's just an off-the-cuff comment to the guest beside you. Something along the lines of "Didn't the bride look lovely" or "What a lovely ceremony" are perfectly acceptable. The important thing is signalling to everyone around the table that you're there and open to conversation.
   
   
3. When people reply to your questions, it's important to listen to the reply and draw them out further. This is how you keep a conversation going. Most people enjoy talking about themselves and if you lead them, they will fill in any awkward silences. When someone asks you a question, you can also return it to them: if they asked how you know the bride, then, when you've replied, ask them the same thing. It isn't about stringing out meaningless conversation all day, but about establishing an early rapport that will come in handy later.
   
   
4. If you're short on topics, then talk about the weather. We're blessed in the UK by this conversational centerpiece. Okay, it's not groundbreaking, but it'll do in an emergency prolonged silence.
   
   
5. Don't be tempted to use your phone during dead moments. We're probably all guilty of this, but it's a real barrier to getting back into a conversation. Keep your head up, smile and try to find an opening in the conversation.
   
   
6. There's the possibility that nobody will be speaking at all. That's fine, there's no need to force small-talk out through gritted teeth. As long as you've been polite and introduced yourself, you're conscience is clean. Receptions are, fortunately, bloated out with speeches, announcements and food. Use these moments to break up the boredom and then make a dash to the more social circles once the evening starts.
   
   
7. Don't panic if you've forgotten someone's name as they'll probably have forgotten yours, too. If you can't remember, then ask them. If you forget after that, ask another member of the party.
   
   
8. Steer clear of political or religious conversations. Particularly, where alcohol is involved. If someone on your table is becoming a problem then try ''mislaying'' the table wine. If they continue being loud, drunk or unsociable, then don't go to the bride or groom but to another member of the bridal party. Try approaching the best man or one of the bridesmaids for help. The key thing is not to get drawn into their potential scene.

The expectation of walking into the unfamiliar will be worse than the reality. That isn't just true of wedding receptions, that's life. Once you've said hello and taken your seat, you'll probably find you'll react perfectly naturally to the situation anyway. Just remember: don't get drunk, don't be rude, don't ignore people, stay off the phone and listen when others speak to you. Avoid awkward topics and above all else: make sure you've been introduced.

If you have any wedding reception horror stories, we'd love to hear them.